I feel so helpless right now

"K-Roll-PorscheTamer" (k-roll390) 02/24/2016 at 00:11 • Filed to: Kroll

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I’m panicking and horribly depressed right now. I’m sitting behind the door to my room in pitch black darkness sobbing because I know I won’t be able to pass my physics midterm in 10 hours.

If I can’t pass physics, even if I pass my other classes with exceptional grades, my gpa is gonna tank to the point where the school will no doubt suspend me for s year for failing to meet their academic requirements. And all my friends will go on and get jobs and internships and I’ll be stuck working retail for my parents for who knows how long trying to make ends meet and what little dreams I’ll have left all the while everyone else is happy and successful.

Oh sure I could withdraw from the class, I’m already taking the minimal amount of hours to be a full time student, I’m loosing my mind as I type this.

I’m trying as hard as I bloody can, or I think I can, but I’m ruining myself. I can’t focus, study for shit, I get distracted easily and I just can’t do anything right at the moment. No way I can do anything for my exam even if I stare at my notes, power points and homework problems until the exam, I’m just FUCKED. And there’s nothing anyone can do to help me and it would be a miracle if I could pass this class; but miracles don’t exist for me.

College: the make it or break it for your future and everything you dream about. Because if you’re not successful here, you’re fucked everywhere else. Just why the hell cant I learn and understand things as fast as everyone else? The hell did I do to deserve this rubbish brain that takes too long to get the important things that make my future. All it knows at this point are fucking cars and that shit won’t help me now.

I just can't do right at this moment.

Berang > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:18

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My strategy: watch something funny. Get some sleep. Wake up early, study/refresh. Take test. Go back to sleep if needed. If I fail then I’ll just cancel my class at the last possible moment.

College is not the end-all be all. It is also ok to take a break for a quarter too and get your mind and other shit together. In the past it was super common for people to take breaks from school. I don’t know why that changed, but I think it’s a change for the worse.

Zohaibman72 > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:18

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I know how you feel man, just try to push through it. If it helps try not thinking of what is at stake and what could go wrong, try thinking of what happens if you pass and what sucesses you can have. Think of the awesome cars you will own and big house you will be in if you succeed. Thinking of the positives help me with tests.

MLGCarGuy > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:20

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I had that situation a few weeks ago. I got a B+ in algebra 2 and that absolutely tanked my GPA. I’m working 10,000x harder this semester and it still won’t help at all.

The education system is f***ed up.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Zohaibman72 02/24/2016 at 00:20

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I know I can't pass. I can't get my hopes up over the reality of the situation.

RiceRocketeer Extraordinaire > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:20

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2 things whenever I think I’m fucked:

1) One step at a time. There’s time to panic later.

2) Go out on your own terms. You miss all the shots you don’t take - study/cram what you can, see what happens.

Zohaibman72 > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:22

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Try to relax yourself and maybe watch something funny or something that will occupy your mind.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Berang 02/24/2016 at 00:23

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But I’ve had to withdraw from classes in the past. Made me feel like a fucking dumbass for wasting money and time at something I’ll end up having to do again.

How is it not? No ones gonna accept you if you don't have a god damn degree. I might as well go work fast food. All my hopes and dreams are riding on this and I can't do shit.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > MLGCarGuy 02/24/2016 at 00:24

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A B+..........I got a D on my last exam and you got a B+......where's the god damn crazy pills

MLGCarGuy > MLGCarGuy 02/24/2016 at 00:24

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I don’t know if such examples exist for colleges, but try to find a Quizlet set with related materials and study off of that. It helps.

Take frequent breaks and browse social media or Oppo.

Shmevans > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:25

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Best thing you can do is stay calm, turn off your computer, do as much as is reasonable in the next little while and get some rest. I was in the same place in university. It sucks. I was (still am) crap at Calculus/Differential Equations in university and ended up spreading out some classes and taking my time doing my degree in 5 years instead of 4. Now I have a degree in Aerospace Engineering. I work in the Automotive Industry which I love and bad grades were not the end of the world. Just do your best. You’d be surprised how many of your classmates are feeling the exact same way right now. You got this. And whatever happens tomorrow you aren’t a failure. School grades are often a very poor predictor of actual talent anyway. Just do what you love.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Zohaibman72 02/24/2016 at 00:25

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But that's time I could use for studying. Even though I'm just laying on the ground in the dark which is in itself a waste of time. I just can't relax or laugh.

MLGCarGuy > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:26

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I’m gonna pull out the stereotype card and say it’s the Asian mentality.

Sorry.

But anyway, just try your hardest, and I know this sounds difficult (immensely), but when you go and take that exam, stay calm and composed. Don’t be scatterbrained and panic like I did. It’ll screw you up hard.

Flies With Thunderbirds > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:27

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Just do what I did, change your focus. Who told you that this was your only option?

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Shmevans 02/24/2016 at 00:29

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All my notes and homework are on my laptop. It would be so very nice if companies didn't look at grades and gpa when considering employment via internships or else I wouldn't be in crisis mode. At this rate I'll be in college for a decade

Berang > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:30

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A degree is important - but I’m commenting more on don’t treat college like it’s the number one priority in life. I had to take a year off - twice - my best friend had to skip three years before going back and getting his degree. He still got it. He graduated and turned 30 the same year. Sometimes life happens,sometimes your situation gets fucked, and sometimes you just fail, but that doesn’t mean it’s the end. It does suck to waste time and money redoing a class, but redoing is something that’s not off the table. Take it a step at a time. Plus you never know how bad or good you’re going to do until you do it. Never feel afraid to ask for extra credit assignments etc. You never know what help you might get.

Flyboy is FAA certified insane > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:31

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Whenever this happens to me, (especially for an FAA exam) I take a few breaths, chug some redbull, put in some classical music (I like Bach and Tchaikovsky) and just crank out as many problems as I can get done before I pass out.

Then, since that was the last thing you were doing before you slept, you are able to recall them easier

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Flies With Thunderbirds 02/24/2016 at 00:31

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But there's nothing else I want to do. After this, there's just nothing left. I'm pretty sure this is my only option since high paying companies and internships don't want idiots without degrees or anything on paper to show how good they could be.

Shmevans > Shmevans 02/24/2016 at 00:33

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Also, there were 2 separate times during university that I found myself on “academic probation” because of the aforementioned Calculus and Differential Equations courses. At the end of the day the school wants you to succeed and there are tons of resources around that you can and should put to good use. Everything in Physics can be broken down into smaller much more manageable (and memorable) step. Just take your time and make sure you write down as much as you know that you know during the test for each question. then circle back and keep picking away at them. Eventually you’ll have the light bulb moment and you’ll remember some practice question or something that was similar. Just do yourself a favour and move on if you get bogged down by something during the exam. Don’t waste your time getting frustrated cause you don’t remember something. Skip it for the time being and another question may jog your memory. All the best!

Zip-McBump > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:36

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I’m normally not very helpful in situations like this, but I’m sort of going through the worst night of my life and felt like I needed to do some good for someone.

Look, man. I’ve been there, and I know exactly how you feel. It looks like we were on a similar path going in to college, and I had a similar problem with one of my classes (not physics, but calculus; I always just sort of “got” physics and could stumble upon the right answer if I worked at it long enough). I ended up getting suspended and went along a different career path. I then figured out I wasn’t getting anywhere in that field and went back to school for an associate’s degree (at 35 years old, mind you) in a field I never thought I’d end up in at the age of 18.

Now I wonder how much further along I’d be in my current career if I’d just gone this way from the start. The point is, we all have expectations that we want to meet. We want to make our parents proud, we want to do something challenging enough that our career makes us feel useful and important. None of that matters, though.

What really matters is taking care of yourself honestly. I don’t mean be selfish, I just mean that if you take the path that will end the best for you, the people you care about will see that and respect you for it. I can’t really tell you what to do here, but I hope that my experience will provide you a little guidance.

Shmevans > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:36

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Internships are not the be-all and end-all so try not to fixate on that. I didn’t get into my internship so busted my ass networking during school instead. Made a ton of connections at auto industry events and landed myself a job after a year of odd jobs working at Mercedes-Benz Canada Head Office in Marketing (with a degree in Aerospace Eng. Ha!). It was awesome. Life gives you some crazy opportunities. It absolutely is about who you know...

TheHondaBro > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:47

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I know exactly how you feel. I’m currently on my third differential calculus class, and I’ve taken chemistry four times with little achievement.

Hang in there. Put in all the effort you can muster. Even if you fail, you can feel proud for trying, which is a very valuable feeling. Things will get better, buddy.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Shmevans 02/24/2016 at 00:57

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But how else will I get any income to be able to afford anything? Life hasn't given me any worthwhile opportunities as of late.

911e46z06 > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:57

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Look bro. It seems like the end of the world, but you got this. Find a good outline online, grab a few 5 hour energies, and fucking cram. You won’t sleep tonight. You’ll feel like shit tomorrow. You’ll be yelling at yourself constantly. But you’ll scrape out a C. I been there. Way more than I care to admit.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > MLGCarGuy 02/24/2016 at 00:57

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I'm scatterbraining and panicking now

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Berang 02/24/2016 at 00:59

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I’m gonna be stuck in retail and college forever ;_;

I need all the extra credit to pass at this rate.

Shmevans > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 00:59

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You’re overthinking things right now because you are stressed out. Don’t worry about anything long term right now. Just do what you can tomorrow and take it from there.

smobgirl > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 01:04

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At least when I was in classes like that, often times your actual number grade didn't matter so much as how well the rest of the class did. It was a lot more reassuring to get a 37 on an exam when you found out the class average was about a 50. And the entire class can't fail - that screws the professor. So end of semester we were graded on a curve of some sort. Just do the best you can and maybe have a chat with the professor after you've gotten your grade back to see how things really stand.

Frank Grimes > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 01:04

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Just focus on one day at a time. At this point you dont have enough information to know anything. You don’t know you will fail.

You need to start doubting your doubts. It seems like you are comparing the worst that could happen to you with the best that could happen to others. Just because you think something doesn’t mean its true. Challenge the negative unhelpful thoughts with but what if questions?

My school has a academic warning system you can’t register until you talk to a counselor and the try to help you with school resources to help you study etc. after meeting with them and doing some kind of learning resource power point online you can have a warning lifted.

Get tested at school for a learning disability if you believe you have one.

Start trying to answer some of the questions of the unknowns you are worrying about. Such as: What is the academic requirements system? how does it work? etc. Meet with your professor and explain the situation to him. Maybe he will have mercy and allow late work or extra credit or something.

Right now get some exercise to relieve the stress eat something drink some water. Maybe just lay in the middle of the floor and close your eyes and try to meditate.

this isnt the end you could go back to school you could retake the course and fix a bad grade learn from it and move on and forgive yourself and treat yourself like you would treat your son if you had one by being kind.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Frank Grimes 02/24/2016 at 01:22

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How can I forgive myself for failing? Failing is bad. Unhealthy. It ruins everything. If I had a son who failed as much as me I’d feel bad for him getting my shitty failing genes.

If I were to leave school then go back, all my friends would be gone, and I'd be all alone. I don't know what could be worse than being left behind by everyone.

Chris@Carlypso > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 01:27

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Bullshit - failing is a healthy sign of trying. Don’t leave school and go back, learn as much as you can as quickly as you can. If you fail, its a sign you attempted the right amount of risk to actually challenge yourself. Worst comes worst, take physics again.

Chris@Carlypso > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 01:29

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Here’s a little secret too ... grades will get you a good job at Goldman Sachs, McKinsey, Google, and other brand names. Beyond that, your job will be network based, so go find the smartest Motherf* in the class, buy him a beer and cofound a company together.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Shmevans 02/24/2016 at 01:54

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I’m scared of tomorrow even though it's already tomorrow here. I'm scared of what happens in 8 hours.

Frank Grimes > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 02:03

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you arent a robot you are a human and life is a learning process. If your son failed you wouldn’t make him feel like crap or focus on the negative you would try to help him and so it should be with yourself. accept the fact you are hurting for failing and if you have to tell yourself compassionate things.

Do you want friends or a career? I bet you would choose to go back to school even if you were alone. BTW I don’t have friends at school. You can make new ones. Friends aren’t as important and people think.

I know a thing or two about beating myself up and thinking the future is dark and hopeless. I am in college trying to graduate. I spent years not knowing what I was doing and have like 75 credits that apply to nothing I have spent so many hours worrying trying to figure out my future. I have been diagnosed with depression ADHD and anxiety disorder. I have to take pills just to be normal. I have failed quite a few courses. I try to just move on learn and focus on my goal to graduate and take things one day at a time trying to make brave good decisions for the long term.

Captain of the Enterprise > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 06:55

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Have you talked to your therapist about this? It sounds like me a week ago and for me it was not just depression but also anxiety. You're not alone and it's also February which is when seasonal affective disorder is the worst so a lot of people me included get more depressed in February. I'm also in college and I have depression and anxiety issues and have found that medication and therapy have helped immensely. I would talk to your schools counseling center about this and maybe your disabilities office. I registered with my disabilities office and they helped me when I had my breakdown last week.

Flies With Thunderbirds > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 07:52

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That’s bullshit. I’m going to a VoTech to get an AAS in Nondestructive Testing. Average income of $80000, not that your first priority should be how much money you make.

mazda616 > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 07:54

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College is not the be-all end-all. I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Communications and since I live in a crummy town, it’s useless. BUT. I still found a decent job that provides well for my family and doesn’t drive me crazy all that much. :)

Everything, and I do mean everything, happens for a reason. We have to believe that or we’ll all go crazy.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > Flies With Thunderbirds 02/24/2016 at 08:33

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I don’t know what any of that is...

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 08:48

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I’ll share a little college physics story. Many many moons ago, during my freshman year I took a physics class. And passed it. However, I didn’t take the corresponding lab because my counselor only said I needed one lab for my major and I was already taking chemistry. Fast forward to senior year where I learned that I really need to take that physics lab. Here’s the catch, I hadn’t done calculus in over 2 years since I switched majors. I enroll anyway. Basically it comes down to the final lab, where I needed an 88% just to pass the class, and the highest I had done previously was an 82%. I wasn’t a praying man at the time, but somehow through the grace of God I got a 92% on the lab and was able to graduate despite not remembering anything. Moral of the story, be positive and don’t give up.

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 08:52

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I had a lot of friends in college, when I graduated only 2 were still left and after a couple of years everyone drifts apart anyway. That’s life.

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 08:54

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Don’t let your career define you. Plus a career is just a way to enable you to do what you want on your free time. There are plenty of high paying jobs that aren’t engineering or require insane degrees.

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 08:56

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I’ve withdrawn from classes before and I’m sure we all have. Your degree doesn’t define who you are or what your future is.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > wiffleballtony 02/24/2016 at 09:05

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But I don’t want to be alone...

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > wiffleballtony 02/24/2016 at 09:05

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Like what..

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 09:06

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You’ll meet other new people. Friends at work. Female relationships etc.

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 09:08

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Off the top of my head, Information Technology, Healthcare, and Finance. A lot of fields that put a premium on certifications over degrees.

K-Roll-PorscheTamer > wiffleballtony 02/24/2016 at 09:16

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IT......Oh god no. I thought healthcare sucked? And I’ve no interest in anything business or finance related, I tried to avoid that like the plague because it’s not interesting to me in any way.

wiffleballtony > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 09:24

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IT is such a broad field, the worst is help desk stuff, but find something special like networking ot server administration you do well. Help desk stuff is crap. Healthcare pays well, it just takes time. The hard part is getting practical hours as part of the certification. I too hate finance but there is a boatload of cash there, just saying.

Jonathan Harper > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/24/2016 at 16:46

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Everyone has struggles, and everyone is down sometimes, but C’MON MAN pull yourself up by your bootstraps and stop being so negative. You obviously have a family that cares about you and supports you, use your support system and figure your shit out.

Spoon II > K-Roll-PorscheTamer 02/25/2016 at 18:29

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Don’t worry, failing a midterm isn’t the end. Most professors will offer you a larger percentage on your final. All they care about is that you’ve learnt the material during the year. Make a large improvement on your final, and the midterm doesn’t matter at all. Just have a chat with whoever is teaching you in private when they’re having office hours.